We are always more afraid than we wish to be, but we can always be braver than we expect.

It's hard to believe that 2 more weeks have passed by. It's crazy to think that in less than 8 weeks, we will be opening another chapter of this book and continuing our story with our children. I feel like we blinked and it's August!

Yesterday, we met with Dr. Lynch, my OBGYN. No new news, just checked for growth progress and heart rates. Both the boys' heart rates were great-- about 8 beats apart from one another. I'm measuring 34 weeks (I'm 30 weeks tomorrow). We talked to Dr. Lynch about our upcoming appointment at Children's Mercy. Dr. Lynch assured us that we weren't these crazy parents just hanging on to every ounce of hope. He says that at the end of the day, getting a 2nd opinion is great. Because, at this point, there is still this big question mark with Peyton. From the outside, this pregnancy has been pretty much by the book. But when you start to look inside and knowing that Peyton has no fluid, it's hard to understand how he can possibly still be growing, moving and do the same things that Preston is doing. Dr. Lynch explained that if we settle on a plan with Children's Mercy and decide to deliver there, we will not have him as our doctor because CM is in MO. UGH. But, at the end of the day, when the boys are born, if there is a chance for Peyton and we deliver at Shawnee Mission, it is guaranteed that not only will I be separated from Peyton, but so will Preston. That is just not something that we want to have happen.

Today, we met with Dr. Wickstrom, my specialist. Again, no new news. The boys are growing like crazy. Preston is measuring on track to the day, and weighing 3 lbs. 2 oz. Peyton is measuring a few weeks behind and weighing 4 lbs. 7 oz. Of course, we have to accommodate the mass in his stomach-- we're guessing that there is a 29% discrepancy. So that would make Peyton around 3 lbs without the mass. Poor baby boy. To put things into perspective, I'm essentially 30 weeks pregnant and have approx. 6 lbs. 2 oz of "baby" in me. At 40 weeks, 2 days pregnant with Kaylee, she was born at 6 lbs. 8.2 oz. No wonder I feel so big!!

Preston is still breach, but Peyton is head down. These boys are active active active! The girl doing our sonogram was definitely feeling every move, kick and turn from them today! (Side note-- it is SUCH a small world. Our sonographer happens to be from Holton and her mom and my aunt Kathy are good friends and used to work together! You just never know who you know. :)) Dr. Wickstrom says that everything is looking good. I'm not having any contractions, no Braxton Hicks, no nothing, so she feels very confident that I will make it to the date we have tentatively selected. October 3rd. :) I will be 37 weeks 6 days at that point. And, it's my mom's birthday. :) It will be a very special day. We will wait to set the date in stone until after we have met with the team at Children's Mercy. Dr. Wickstrom is anxious to see what the team at CM has to say, as this pregnancy is nothing like anything she has seen before. There is no sign that any of Peyton's organs are failing, his heart is strong, and he is active. He is definitely a fighter.

We will head to Children's Mercy Fetal Health Center August 20th. A little less than 2 weeks away. Although, we would have loved to have gone in sooner, we understand how difficult it is to get in front of the entire team. While we are there, we will meet with a Urologist, the Genetics doctor, the Neonatologist, and several other people to determine the "birth plan" for our boys. They will be doing an in-depth sonogram to see if they can find any fluid around Peyton and then we will hopefully have some answers. From there, we will make the decision to either deliver at Children's Mercy or Shawnee Mission.

We are definitely ready to get a plan in place for our little guys. We aren't giving up hope and we are praying constantly. Last night, I had my first dream about our little guys. One looked just like Nick and the other one looked a lot like me. They were about 9 months old and crawling around and playing. I can't help but think God was sending me a sign.

Again, thank you for all of the prayers and thoughts of our family. To everyone that stops and tells our family how much you are praying for us, thank you. It really means the world and gives us strength and courage every day! We couldn't do it without your support. 

<3,

Nick, Ashley and Kaylee